원글 쓴 사람입니다.

NYC department of consumer affairs 에 파일링 한 글입니다. 어떻게 개선하면 좋을지 의견 부탁드립니다..

This is to report and to complain the most unpleasant and unacceptable discrimination i’ve ever experienced.
On April 17th 2010, Inside Fifth avenue Apple flagship store, I was on line waiting to buy iPad. Soon one man approached to me telling that I can’t buy anything from the store. The reason the store decided not to sell anything to me was that he could identify me as a reseller.
He humiliated me by claming that I am a ‘RESELLER’ in front of many people at apple store. He made false statement by being not able to prove how he could identify me. Accusing someone without any of proper reasoning or evidence is pure discrimination/abuse.
He claimed that he saw me before in the store, which is not TRUE. And I asked him to prove it by
-. I was willing to give him all of my credit cards’ number so that he could track down my past transactions at the store. But he refused my offer.
-. I asked him to show me CCTV tape that took picture of me in the store as an evidence. He refused telling me ‘I don’t have authority to do that’.
He walked away from me ignoring my request to give me his business card and to let me know his full name. He disappeared behind one of doors at the store and I couldn’t see him afterwards.
Later I could find out his full name asking the other manager at the store. His name is David Kamilar, store leader at Fifth avenue at Apple Retail.
( I have a dialogue form of document that I wrote to rememeber the conversation bewteen me and him. I don’t include it now because it’s too long. I will provide it to you if it’s asked. )
Thank you

Here are my $0.02. In this letter, I think what’s missing is “what you want from them”.

1. On April 17th 2010, –> On April 17th 2010 around xx:yy pm (am),
2. Inside Fifth avenue Apple flagship store, I was on line… –> at the Fifth avenue …., I was in the line…
3. Soon one man approached to me… –> After xx minutes of wait in the line, a store employee came to me…
4. in front of many people at apple store –> in front of many people in the store
5. I have a dialogue form of document that I wrote to remember the conversation between me and him –> I have written down the conversation between him and me write after the incident in order to file a complaint. I am willing to provide it if requested. (My comment: I still think you’d better include them now.)

Again, this letter is missing “what you want”. I hope other people will give you more comments. Please give us updates after you file the complaint. Good luck.

마지막에 땡큐하지 마시고 본문에서 더 강하게 컴플레인 하셔야겠네요.(소송까지 생각할정도라면)
제가 애플 매니저면 이 편지는 $20 선물권으로 막을수 있을것 같은 내용입니다. 쪽은 많이 팔리셨겠지만 객관적인 편지 내용이 그러합니다. 수정해보세요.

THANK YOU란 말은 이런 상황에서 쓸데 없는 말입니다. 빼시고요. 구체적으로 원하는 것을 적는 것이 좋겠습니다. 저같으면 그곳보다는 애플 매장 총괄 매니저 연락처를 알아내서 그사람에게 강력하게 항의하겠습니다. 절대로 그냥 넘어가지마시기바랍니다.

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